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"JOKE OF THE MONTH"
The rules are simple to win: No "xxx" jokes, sorry. Kit Menkin cannot win (relatives, friends and employees can enter and win). Please note, if in the decision of the judges there is no "best" joke, a previous month may be included, and like in horseshoes, there are no ties. Winners of previous months can also win a second or third time - There is no limit.
Please
send me your favorite joke. The first one to send it, not only gets the credit,
but a good bottle of wine or a box of chocolates (the winner’s choice).
Winner for January 2002
Dan Sorkin
Walnut Creek, California
" Warshawsky's Bar"
His prize: $100 Certificate for Dinner at California Cafe
Dan has won six times!!!
"Warshawsky's Bar"
An Irishman, an Italian, and a Polish guy are in a bar. They are having a good time and all agree that the bar is a nice place. Then the Irishman says, "Aye, this is a great bar, but where I come from, back in Dublin, there's a BETTER one. At McDougall's, you buy a drink, you buy another drink, and McDougall himself will buy your third drink!"
The others agree that sounds like a great place.Then the Italian says, "Yeah, that's a great bar, but where I come from, there's a BETTER one. Over in Brooklyn, there's this place, Vinnie's. At Vinnie's, you buy a drink, Vinnie buys you a drink. You buy anudda drink, Vinnie buys you anudda drink."
Everyone
agrees that sounds like a great bar.Then the Polish guy says, "YOU THINK
THAT'S GREAT???? Where I come from, there's this place called Warshawsky's.
At Warshawsky's, they buy you your first drink, they buy you your second
drink, they buy you your third drink, and then, they take you in the back
and get you laid!" "Wow!" say the other two. "That's fantastic! Did that
actually happen to you?" "No", replies the Polish guy, "but it happened
to my sister.
Dan
has won previously five times, including two June's in a row,
June 2001, June 2000,
December 1999 , October
1998 , and August 1998. Dan,
as with all previous winners, is on the joke panel.
Past Jokes of the Month
Year
2001
December
Dan
Sorkin
Walnut Creek, California
$100 Certificate for Dinner at California Cafe
Dan has won six times!!!
"
Warshawsky's Bar"
November
Rob
Yohe,
Stillwater, Kansas
1998
Dalla Valle Pietre Rosse, Dalla Valle Vineyards, Oakville, Napa and
1996 Chateau Woltner Chardonnay, St. Thomas Vineyards, Howell Mountain,
Napa
"Viagra"
October
Farley
Gouner
San Jose, California
He
did not want wine or chocolate, but to have lunch with Kit Menkin.
(please no cracks that is the second place prize.)
"Non-Violent Solution"
September
Samuel
R. Swift, A.P.L.C.
San Jose, California
A case
of Gordon Birsch Marzen beer
"Stock
Tip"
August
Steve
Gabriel,
San Jose, California
A case of .375 ml 1995 Duckhorn Merlot Howell Mountain
*
Finally! -- a Blonde GUY Joke!
July
Charlene Lunny
San Francisco, California
Dinner at Scoma's Restaurant, San Francisco
"BMW"
June
Dan
Sorkin, Piedmont, California
zChocolate
"Fishing
in East Texas"
May
Jeff
Reynolds, Oakland, California.
This is his second time. He won
in January. He receives six bottles of 1997
Chateau Woltner Howell Mountain Chardonnay.
“Stopped by the Police”
April
Hal
Sharpe, Paradise, California
He receives the best chocolate assortment
from Dan's Chocolates.
"Scotch and Water"
March
Leigh
Weimers, Los Gatos, California
French zChocolate Peche",
1996 Galante Vineyards Cabernet Sasuvignon Red Rose Hill Carmel Valley, 1998
Eos Chardonnay Paso Robles
"Grandpa"
February
Larry
Faber
Mountain View, California
"
Nevada Winter "
Second
time he has won, dinner for two with Kit and Sue, plus a bottle of his favorite
wine, 1996 Duckhorn Vineyard Merlot
January
Jeff
Reynolds
Oakland, California
Thirteen!!!
A
bottle of 1996 Joseph Phelps Merlot Napa Valley
Past Jokes of the Month
Year 2000
December
Rob
Yohe,
Stillwater, Kansas
"Bald Eagle"
A bottle
of 1996 Robert Sinskey Vineyards Merlot Los Carneros of Napa Valley
November
Leigh
Weimers,
Los Gatos, California
Pest Control Inspector Gets Caught
Two pound box of Schurra's Fancy Chocolate.
(also a Christmas
present to Leigh and Geri)
October
Jeff
Wong,
of San Francisco, California
Take
my wife, please
One pound Box of Godiva Chocolate.
September
Captain
James Sloan, Salvation Army
of San Jose, California
POLISH AIR
DISASTER
One pound Millenium Box of See's Chocolate.
August
Larry
Faber, Mountain View, California
Jewish
Sex Therapy
Bottle of 1995 Duckhorn Napa Estate Merlot.
July
John Wold of
St. Charles, Illinois
Father
O'Reilley
Two pound box of Fancy Godiva Chocolate and Truffles.
June
Dan Sorkin of Piedmont, California
Jewish
Poker Game
Rutherford Hill 1984 Cabernet Sauvignon, Methuslah.
(he
is a four time winner, this winery not only overlooks Auberge du Soleil in Napa
Valley, but producess some outstanding red and white wine)
May
Chuck Brady,
Saratoga, California
Man goes to see the Rabbi
A
bottle of 1996 Robert Sinskey Merlot Los Carneros Napa Private Reserve.
April
Stewart Kahn of
Redondo Beach, California.
80,000
Blondes
A 1 ˝ pound box of Godiva truffles plus a two pound box of Godiva
Gold Ballotin chocolate as his award.
A Second Time Winner
March
John Wold of St. Charles, Illinois
The Internet Warnings
A
1 pound box of Godiva truffles as his reward
February
Dash Menkin of Elko,
Nevada
The
Blonde and the Attorney
A big box of See's Millennium Tin chocolate
as his award.
January
Jim
Hanzlik of Watsonville, California
A
big box of See's favorite, Millenium Tin Collector,
plus a Valentine
Day box to give to his sweetheart
Past
Jokes of the Month
Year 1999
December
Dan
Sorkin of Piedmont, California
A
case of Chateau St. Julien Monterey Merlot
Third
Time Winner
November
Stewart
Kahn of Los Angeles, California
One
pound box of Godiva Chocolate
October
Randy
Warshawsky of San Jose, California
1994 Joullian Cabernet Sauvignon, Carmel
Valley
1996 Castillo Saugiuvese
September
Dougald
Turnbull of Campbell, California
1989
Georis Cabernet Sauvignon, Carmel Valley
1995 Turnbull Cabernet Sauvignon
Napa Valley, Oakville
August
Wally
Lunny of San Francisco/Glen Elen, California
A case of 1997 Chateau
St. Julien Monterey Estate Merlot
Second
Time Winner
July
Kevin
Skelly of Saratoga, California
1994 Robert Sinskey Pinot Noir Reserve,
Los Carneros, Napa Valley
1995 Robert Sinskey Merlot Reserve, Los Carneros,
Napa Valley
June
Chris
Cross of Hayward, California
1997
Duckhorn Vineyard Napa Valley Sauvignon Blanc,
1996 Clos Du Bois Sonoma County
Pinot Noir
and a box of Schurras Fancy Chocolate
May
John Turnbull of Mendocino, California
1995 Turnbull Cabernet Sauvignon, Napa Valley,
Oaksville
April
Jerry
Jacob, San
Rafael, California
One
pound box of Godiva Chocolate
March
Bob Bressler, Los Altos Hills, California
One
pound box of Godiva Chocolate
February
R. Donald
Chapman, San Jose, California
1994 Chateau Latour a Pomerol, prop.
Mme. L.P. Lacaste Loubal
January
Jim
Beck, Los Gatos, California
1994 Estate Grown Copper-Garrod Cabernet
Sauvignon, Santa Cruz Mountain Appellation
Past
Jokes of the Month
Year 1998
December
Russ
Mattos, Mountain View, California
Two great tickets plus parking pass
for the Monday Night San Francisco 49ergame at 3Com Park
November
Kim
Davison, San Jose, California
Case of 1998 Campus Oaks Chardonnay
October
Dan
Sorkin, Piedmont, California
Two pound box of Godiva Chocolate and
second time winner,
one pound box of Godiva Truffles
September
Rosalie,
Santa Cruz, California
1995 "Reserve Speciale" Barons de
Rothschild (Lafite)Medoc
August
Dan
Sorkin, Piedmont, California
One pound box of Godiva Chocolate
July
Jim
Swander, Bellevue, Washington
1989 Ridge Santa Cruz Mountain Monte
Bello
June
Nanette
Weintraub, Los Gatos, California
One pound box of Godiva Chocolate
May
Walter
J. Lunny, III, San Francisco/Glen Ellen, California
1976 Bolla Amarone
Classico Chianti
April
Jim
Hanzlik, Watsonville, California
One pound box of Godiva Chocolate
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