Dougald Turnbull of Santa Clara, California

The rules are simple to win: No "xxx" jokes, sorry. Kit Menkin cannot win (relatives, friends and employees can enter and win). Please note, if in the decision of the judges there is no "best" joke, a previous month may be included, and like in horseshoes, there are no ties. Winners of previous months can also win a second or third time - There is no limit.

Please send me your favorite joke. The first one to send it, not only gets the credit, but a good bottle of wine or a box of chocolates (the winner’s choice).

Winner for October 2004

Randy Warshawsky
San Jose, CA.

His prize; a bottle of 1995 Larkmead Napa Valley Merlot

(This is from our archives, October, 1999, when Randy won his joke:)

Lady Golfer

Four veteran lady golfers played every Sunday at La Rinconada in Los Gatos, teeing off precisely at 7:00am. Unfortunately, one of them moved away. They were talking about who would replace her at their Saturday games.

A young woman standing near the tee said, "Hey, I like golf, can I join the group? I am new, but I am really learning how to play this game"

They were hesitant, but said she could come once to try it and they could see what they thought.

They all agreed and she said, "Good, I'll be there at 6:30 or 6:45."

She showed up right at 6:30, and wound up setting a course record with a 7-under par round.

The veteran lady golfers were very impressed, invited her to join their group, and bragged about how they thought this young novice how to play so well. She was also a lot of fun and the veteran lady golfers enjoyed her company. Happily they invited her back the next week and she said "Sure, I'll be here at 6:30 of 6:45."

Again, she showed up at 6:30 Sunday morning. Only this time, she played left handed, and matched her 7-under par score of the previous week.

By now the veteran lady golfers were totally amazed, and they asked her to join the group for keeps.

They had Chardonnay from Testarossa after their round, and the oldest of the group asked her, " How do you decide of you are going to golf right-handed or left-handed?"

She said, "That's easy. Before I leave for the golf course, I pull the covers off my husband, who sleeps nude. If his member is pointing to the right, I golf right-handed; if it's pointed to the left, I golf left-handed."

One of the veteran lady golfers asked, " What if it's pointing straight up?"

She said, Then I'll be here at 6:45."

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Randy Warshawsky was born and raised in the Willow Glen area of San Jose, California, and he currently resides there with his wife. He has three grown children and one grandson (Eddie spaghetti)

He is very active in the local community serving on the Board of Directors for District 12 Little League as the treasurer and on the board of a charity golf event called Touched by Cancer. He also on the board of directors as the treasurer for the Mission Society of Enrolled Agents.

Randy's entrepreneurial spirit led him into two businesses. First as the owner of Big W Liquors in Santa Clara, and now, as The Tax Man in Willow Glen.

Randy and his brother operated Big W Liquors for 6 years. The brothers built a substantial business, with a loyal customer base - customers who remain friends to this day. After Fair Trade was repealed, the brothers decided to pursue other interests. Randy laughs about his bookkeeping for the liquor store. "I did everything by hand in hard-bound ledger books with good old-fashioned pencils".

Tax and bookkeeping seemed a natural avenue to explore after leaving the liquor store. Randy started his tax business in 1986 while working for a local bank. Randy is an Enrolled Agent with the IRS and was certified by the State of California to teach tax preparation courses. After referring to himself as "Randy, the tax man" in his phone conversations, the name seemed a natural for his business. Randy continued to build his business while working for a local attorney in the tax department. Eventually, his own business grew to the point where he worked full time for himself. And now we have a full time staff that grows even larger during tax season.

Those pencils and ledgers have been replaced. Randy uses a network of computers and sophisticated software in his business today. The Tax Man provides tax and bookkeeping services for Individuals, Estates, Trusts, Partnerships, and Corporations. He specializes in small to medium sized businesses. In addition to tax preparation and bookkeeping, Randy also does payroll, audits (all agencies), and business development for his clients.

Randy's hobbies include dancing, four-wheeling, poker, a variety of family activities and babysitting his grandson Eddie. Last time a Bio was written it said that they were in the final stages of an addition to their home. Guess what - they are at it again!

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