Winner Joke of the Month

The rules are simple to win: No "xxx" jokes, sorry. Kit Menkin cannot win (relatives, friends and employees can enter and win). Please note, if in the decision of the judges there is no "best" joke, a previous month may be included, and like in horseshoes, there are no ties. Winners of previous months can also win a second or third time - There is no limit.

Please send me your favorite joke. The first one to send it, not only gets the credit, but a good bottle of wine or a box of chocolates (the winner’s choice).

His prize: He did not want wine or chocolate, but to have lunch with Kit Menkin. (please no cracks that is the second place prize.)

To the Taliban from the American people:

Give us Bin Laden,or we will take all of your women
and send them to college.

After the sale of Pacific Western Bank to Comerica, where he was the executive vice-president, Farley Gouner became an investor. He spent most of his time on the computer. Basically from 1991 to 1999, he was a real stock trader on the internet. He was very successful.

In July, 1999 he decided to get out of the stock market, as he saw it was going to have many problems. He became bored, did not want to go back into banking, as he said it had changed too much. In looking around for a business to buy, he decided to utilize his past lending skills with analytical skills and become a business broker, joining Business Team, the oldest and largest independent business brokerage firm in California. Several such investors as himself worked there as they were also looking for companies to invest in or buy. Business Team at this time represents +300 companies for sale, spread over 40 or more agents in seven offices in Northern California.

How does he find business today: "tough-although I just represented both buyer and seller and closed the largest deal for this company in 2001. It took 21 months to accomplish from start to finish...finding a bank to finance a buyer even with fifty percent cash down was next to impossible."

When is the best time to sell a business? "On the upswing; when market conditions are in your favor--most business owners sell when business and/or health is slowing and they've run out of energy to go to the next level of sales and income." When is the best time to buy a business?" When business owners run out of energy and want to sell because of this or their health. The next 12 months will be good for buyers."

Farley is still active on the computer, does some gardening for his hobby and likes to spend as much time as he can with his wife Suzie, who he has been married for 34 years. They have two children, Brandon and Scott, 25 and 21. He says they are both employed and he is very proud of them.

Past Jokes of the Month

Year 2001

September
Samuel R. Swift, A.P.L.C.
San Jose, California
A case of Gordon Birsch Marzen beer
"Stock Tip"

August
Steve Gabriel,
San Jose, California
A case of .375 ml 1995 Duckhorn Merlot Howell Mountain
* Finally! -- a Blonde GUY Joke!

July
Charlene Lunny
San Francisco, California
Dinner at Scoma's Restaurant, San Francisco
"BMW"

June
Dan Sorkin, Piedmont, California
zChocolate
"Fishing in East Texas"

May
Jeff Reynolds, Oakland, California.
This is his second time. He won in January. He receives six bottles of 1997 Chateau Woltner Howell Mountain Chardonnay.
“Stopped by the Police”

April
Hal Sharpe, Paradise, California
He receives the best chocolate assortment from Dan's Chocolates.
"Scotch and Water"

March
Leigh Weimers, Los Gatos, California
French zChocolate Peche", 1996 Galante Vineyards Cabernet Sasuvignon Red Rose Hill Carmel Valley, 1998 Eos Chardonnay Paso Robles
"Grandpa"

February
Larry Faber
Mountain View, California
" Nevada Winter "
Second time he has won, dinner for two with Kit and Sue, plus a bottle of his favorite wine, 1996 Duckhorn Vineyard Merlot

January
Jeff Reynolds
Oakland, California
Thirteen!!!
A bottle of 1996 Joseph Phelps Merlot Napa Valley

Year 2000

December
Rob Yohe,
Stillwater, Kansas
"Bald Eagle"
A bottle of 1996 Robert Sinskey Vineyards Merlot Los Carneros of Napa Valley

November
Leigh Weimers,
Los Gatos, California
Pest Control Inspector Gets Caught
Two pound box of Schurra's Fancy Chocolate.
(also a Christmas present to Leigh and Geri)

October
Jeff Wong,
of San Francisco, California
Take my wife, please
One pound Box of Godiva Chocolate.

September
Captain James Sloan, Salvation Army
of San Jose, California
POLISH AIR DISASTER
One pound Millenium Box of See's Chocolate.

August
Larry Faber, Mountain View, California
Jewish Sex Therapy
Bottle of 1995 Duckhorn Napa Estate Merlot.

July
John Wold of St. Charles, Illinois
Father O'Reilley
Two pound box of Fancy Godiva Chocolate and Truffles.

June
Dan Sorkin of Piedmont, California
Jewish Poker Game
Rutherford Hill 1984 Cabernet Sauvignon, Methuslah.
(he is a four time winner, this winery not only overlooks Auberge du Soleil in Napa Valley, but producess some outstanding red and white wine)

May
Chuck Brady, Saratoga, California
Man goes to see the Rabbi
A bottle of 1996 Robert Sinskey Merlot Los Carneros Napa Private Reserve.

April
Stewart Kahn of Redondo Beach, California.
80,000 Blondes
A 1 ½ pound box of Godiva truffles plus a two pound box of Godiva Gold Ballotin chocolate as his award.
A Second Time Winner

March
John Wold of St. Charles, Illinois
The Internet Warnings
A 1 pound box of Godiva truffles as his reward

February
Dash Menkin of Elko, Nevada
The Blonde and the Attorney
A big box of See's Millennium Tin chocolate as his award.

January
Jim Hanzlik of Watsonville, California
A big box of See's favorite, Millenium Tin Collector,
plus a Valentine Day box to give to his sweetheart

Past Jokes of the Month
Year 1999

December
Dan Sorkin of Piedmont, California
A case of Chateau St. Julien Monterey Merlot
Third Time Winner

November
Stewart Kahn of Los Angeles, California
One pound box of Godiva Chocolate

October
Randy Warshawsky of San Jose, California
1994 Joullian Cabernet Sauvignon, Carmel Valley
1996 Castillo Saugiuvese

September
Dougald Turnbull of Campbell, California
1989 Georis Cabernet Sauvignon, Carmel Valley
1995 Turnbull Cabernet Sauvignon Napa Valley, Oakville

August
Wally Lunny of San Francisco/Glen Elen, California
A case of 1997 Chateau St. Julien Monterey Estate Merlot
Second Time Winner

July
Kevin Skelly of Saratoga, California
1994 Robert Sinskey Pinot Noir Reserve, Los Carneros, Napa Valley
1995 Robert Sinskey Merlot Reserve, Los Carneros, Napa Valley

June
Chris Cross of Hayward, California
1997 Duckhorn Vineyard Napa Valley Sauvignon Blanc,
1996 Clos Du Bois Sonoma County Pinot Noir
and a box of Schurras Fancy Chocolate

May
John Turnbull of Mendocino, California
1995 Turnbull Cabernet Sauvignon, Napa Valley, Oaksville

April
Jerry Jacob, San Rafael, California
One pound box of Godiva Chocolate

March
Bob Bressler, Los Altos Hills, California
One pound box of Godiva Chocolate

February
R. Donald Chapman, San Jose, California
1994 Chateau Latour a Pomerol, prop. Mme. L.P. Lacaste Loubal

January
Jim Beck, Los Gatos, California
1994 Estate Grown Copper-Garrod Cabernet Sauvignon, Santa Cruz Mountain Appellation

Past Jokes of the Month
Year 1998

December
Russ Mattos, Mountain View, California
Two great tickets plus parking pass for the Monday Night San Francisco 49ergame at 3Com Park

November
Kim Davison, San Jose, California
Case of 1998 Campus Oaks Chardonnay

October
Dan Sorkin, Piedmont, California
Two pound box of Godiva Chocolate and second time winner,
one pound box of Godiva Truffles

September
Rosalie, Santa Cruz, California
1995 "Reserve Speciale" Barons de Rothschild (Lafite)Medoc

August
Dan Sorkin, Piedmont, California
One pound box of Godiva Chocolate

July
Jim Swander, Bellevue, Washington
1989 Ridge Santa Cruz Mountain Monte Bello

June
Nanette Weintraub, Los Gatos, California
One pound box of Godiva Chocolate

May
Walter J. Lunny, III, San Francisco/Glen Ellen, California
1976 Bolla Amarone Classico Chianti

April
Jim Hanzlik, Watsonville, California
One pound box of Godiva Chocolate